Gossip played a crucial role in primitive societies, helping people keep track of each other and determine who to trust. Evolutionary scientists believe that gossip among early humans had positive effects on societies and offered advantages to those who participated. Even today, gossip remains popular. Although many claim to dislike gossip, the truth is that most of us engage in it. Humans may be naturally inclined to gossip due to our evolutionary development.
In the workplace, gossip serves various purposes such as socialising, communicating, accessing information and relieving stress. Some managers use gossip to gather information about employees, even legitimising it under the guise of "anonymous feedback." However, this practice has significant drawbacks, as illustrated by the following example:
Manager: "There is a complaint that you are not listening."
Employee: "Who says that?"
Manager: "I can’t say that."
Employee: "Nobody has told me anything about this. Can you be more specific? When and in what situations was I not listening?"
Manager: "I don’t know that."
This example demonstrates that anonymous feedback is inherently flawed. It lacks context, specificity, and direct observation, leading to resistance. The person receiving the feedback might think, "If they were well-intentioned, they would talk to my face, not behind my back. Their aim must be to damage my reputation by making me look bad." Indeed, complaints can sometimes be used to gain personal or group advantages, rather than to address genuine concerns. Such complaints are often associated with gossip and backstabbing, spreading resentment and tension throughout the organisation. These toxic environments demoralise teams, undermine trust, make it difficult to work together, and negatively impact performance.
As a leader, fostering a culture of open communication and transparency is essential for keeping your team motivated and productive. Transparency goes beyond sharing information; it involves building trust. Gathering information behind closed doors breeds distrust among employees.
Leaders must respond to gossip strongly and transparently. Consider the following example of addressing a complaint and encouraging direct communication:
Employee (E): "Amy always gives me project summaries late, so I have less time than I need to prepare well for the presentation."
Leader (L): "What do you expect me to do about this?"
E: "I want you to talk to her about getting her work done on time."
L: "Have you spoken to Amy about this issue and given her any feedback?"
E: "No, I don't think the feedback I give will change anything. She leaves everything to the last minute. Others are complaining about the same issue. That's why I came to you."
L: "So, you haven't talked to her because you believe she won't change her behaviour, right?"
E: "When you said that I realized I was being prejudiced. I'm also worried that if I give feedback, she might be offended, and our relationship might be damaged."
L: "Your belief that your feedback won't be effective and might harm your relationship is stopping you from talking to her directly. If you were Amy, who would you prefer to have this conversation with: your colleague or your manager?"
E: "I would definitely want the person with the issue to talk to me directly instead of involving the manager."
L: "Exactly. Direct communication is usually more effective. So, will you talk to her, explain the problem with late project summaries, and give her some constructive feedback?"
E: "Yes, I will. I’ll talk to her, tell her how it’s a problem when project summaries are submitted late, explain what I need, and give her constructive feedback."
L: "Great!"
In this conversation, the leader emphasised the importance of direct feedback by asking if the employee had spoken to the complainee about the issue. This encourages a culture of openness and accountability, where employees feel empowered to address issues directly with their colleagues. The leader also used a coaching approach to help the employee with the complaint recognise the biases and beliefs that prevented him from addressing the problem with his colleague. By framing the situation from Amy's perspective and asking who he would prefer to hear feedback from, the leader helped him understand the value of direct communication. This not only builds trust but also fosters stronger relationships within the team.
Empowering individuals to take responsibility for resolving their own conflicts cultivates a workplace that is transparent, mature, and psychologically safe. This approach not only builds trust but also strengthens team dynamics and boosts overall performance.
By replacing a culture of gossip with one of open communication and constructive feedback, leaders can foster a more positive and productive work environment, where employees feel valued and engaged.
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